Online campaign combats Christmas loneliness

Christmas is being overshadowed by COVID-19 for the second year running, with many people once again forced into isolation. However, Christian Fein, the founder of the initiative KeinerBleibtAllein ["No one remains alone"], is determined not to let the pandemic prevail.

"Coronavirus does make people lonely, but it also makes loneliness less alarming," he told DW. Restrictions on contact increase social isolation, but Fein said the "intensity of loneliness" is not as great as in previous years.

And he should know. The 36-year-old security software consultant created the hashtag #KeinerBleibtAllein on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram in 2016, to connect those who are feeling lonely with others keen to meet and celebrate with new people at Christmas and New Year.

COVID-19 has swept aside taboos

"Because our social lives have ground to a halt, it's suddenly quite OK to be home alone, because everyone else is home alone, too," said Fein. "Loneliness is no longer taboo."

But although the issue of loneliness has acquired a whole new dimension during the pandemic, many people still dread having to spend the holidays alone.

Fein knows that feeling from personal experience. In 2016, following a relationship breakup, he found himself spending Christmas alone for the first time in his life. He sat down in front of the computer and expressed his loneliness in a tweet with the hashtag #keinertwittertallein ["No one tweets alone"]. He received so many responses that he realized he had hit a nerve.

Surge of interest following church involvement

Fein started to connect people via his Twitter account. In 2017, more than 2,700 people joined in. He also set up the Facebook group "Weihnachten (nicht) allein" — "Christmas (not) alone." Then, in 2018, Germany's Protestant Church raised awareness of the initiative as part of its campaign against loneliness over the holiday season.

The following year, 2019, there was a huge surge of interest. Some 80,000 messages were exchanged between more than 63,000 users, and 6,000 participants spent Christmas in the company of someone new. There was a break last year because of the pandemic, but in 2021 the initiative has once again picked up steam.

Rene Reichelt, a 31-year-old computer scientist, has been hosting Christmas dinners as part of the initiative since 2018. "I cooked for 11 people," he said, recalling the first dinner with his guests. "It was a mixture of neighbors and new people, which made it easy to start a conversation."

'Loneliness is a real burden'

His guests weren't a completely unfamiliar quantity, either. Participants who have asked to be connected are directed to check out each other's Facebook profiles beforehand. That way they can all get a sense of who they'll be meeting, and can make contact directly in advance.

This year, Reichelt's festive guest list is probably going to look a bit different. "We're reaching people who usually might not have been interested in what we have to offer, because of coronavirus," said Fein.

And because the initiative is an online project, more young people are coming forward. "Loneliness is a real burden for them, because there's a lot of shame associated with it," said Fein. "Our project could be a door opener, helping society to address the issue of loneliness."

Before the pandemic, loneliness was seen primarily as a problem for older people. The Silbernetz telephone hotline for senior citizens estimates that, in Germany, around 8 million people between the ages of 60 and 99 are affected by loneliness or isolation at least some of the time.

That picture has changed as a result of COVID-19. According to a study published by the German Center of Gerontology in April, the risk of loneliness has increased throughout society during the pandemic, irrespective of age, gender and education.

Unlike initiatives like Silbernetz and traditional telephone counseling services, the digital platform KeinerBleibtAllein only arranges contact between people at Christmas and New Year's. "We thought there would be interested in continuing the service beyond that, especially in Berlin, but it didn't catch on," said Fein. "People don't know what to talk to each other about, apart from loneliness."

Reichelt remembers his mother often inviting single neighbors over to spend Christmas with the family. Now he's continuing the tradition, but without the religious aspect.

"I think of Christmas as a holiday when I'm going to be cooking anyway, and I have an opportunity to share with others," he said. "After all, you can't cancel the holidays. They'll still take place, no matter what."

This article was originally in German